


Looking Glass

by chiaroscuroverse, fleurdeneuf



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Aphrodisiacs, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Dubious Consent, Eventual Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Protectiveness, Romance, Team TARDIS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-16
Updated: 2017-10-13
Packaged: 2018-12-30 07:24:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 20,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12103677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chiaroscuroverse/pseuds/chiaroscuroverse, https://archiveofourown.org/users/fleurdeneuf/pseuds/fleurdeneuf
Summary: Rose is given an aphrodisiac drug at a club, and only the Doctor can help her. In the process, they discover what’s been right there all along.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A collaboration between [chiaroscuroverse](https://chiaroscuroverse.tumblr.com) and [fleurdeneuf ](https://fleurdeneuf.tumblr.com)
> 
> The trope is dubcon by definition. We handled with care, but please avoid if this is triggering. If you would like to know how exactly it will unfold to decide, click [here](http://chiaroscuroverse.tumblr.com/spoilers) for spoilers. :) CW in this chapter for attempted noncon.
> 
> RATING WILL GO UP 
> 
> Updates on Friday nights!

Jack Harkness liked to consider himself an expert on beautiful things, in all their glorious diversity. This dance club gave him many such sights to admire from his barstool while he sat out a song and let the sweat cool on his brow. Alien species, humanoid and otherwise, united in the pulsing of the dance floor, but he could easily be content watching Rose Tyler’s glowing smile in the swirling lights while she dipped and turned.

Not that he couldn’t spare a little time to appreciate the beauty in the bartender’s beautiful smile as well, and the way her long neck and shoulders were covered with shimmering down that looked like it would be quite pleasant to touch. He smiled back while she shook his drink. Definitely wouldn’t mind exploring more about her species, given time. She must have felt the same--she dragged her fingers across his while placing the glass in his hand, and leaned over to whisper a proposition in his ear. 

“Sorry, darlin, I’m on friend-duty tonight,” Jack said, tilting his head toward the dance floor.

“Pity.” Her eyes lingered on his body, then returned to meet his. “I’ll be here tomorrow night. Off duty.” 

“If my captain doesn’t insist we leave, I’ll be back.” He stood and held out a hand with a slight wink. “Jack Harkness.” 

She took his hand and said her name--he'd need to repeat that to himself to get right. “I hope to see you tomorrow,” he said, kissing her knuckles before heading into the crowd.

He’d had his eye on a handsome, speckle-faced male humanoid, not for his own purposes, but because he’d seemed to be circling closer to Rose and the group of fellow travelers he and Rose had befriended, ever since Jack had left the dance floor. Playing it cool, maybe, Jack thought, but something about the way he’d hovered for so long while keeping his eyes on Rose had Jack’s back up. Still, nice rhythm, nice body--Jack briefly considered trying to pull him to avoid him bothering Rose, but his mind was still occupied by the intriguing downy lady at the bar. 

Besides, as the alien man finally made his approach and worked in between Rose and one of her new friends, Rose turned and danced with him, happily. Her hands rested loosely on the man’s shoulders; Jack noticed she didn’t let her body get especially close. She turned her back to his front, bouncing with the music, flushed, a strand of hair caught in her wide smile. Jack smiled affectionately. 

The whole point of this night was to show Rose a good time, give her a chance to dance her heart out. “Shore leave!” the Doctor had announced when they’d landed here on this intergalactic resort. “Go have yourselves some _human_ fun.” 

In spite of the dance moves he’d showed off on Jack’s first night, the Doctor had begged off coming with them, not disagreeably. “Repairs,” he’d said, tapping a spanner on the console, and continued in a casual voice, “Make sure she’s home safe.” But the hard look he’d given Jack made it clear messing that up might be the last thing he ever did. Jack half-expected Rose to be disappointed, but she’d only rolled her eyes and told the Doctor he’d miss out on all the fun. (“Countin’ on that!”)

He was pretty sure she didn’t see the Doctor’s eyes follow her to the door. Those two…

“Why don’t you meet us later, Doc?” he’d asked, one last time. 

“Naw. No need.” He’d paused an extra second while Rose put on strappy heels. “I want her to have a good time. She deserves it.” And then a slight sideways grin at Jack. “Guess you do, too.” 

Jack passed their new friends and continued dancing his way through the crowd toward Rose, who’d moved further away, keeping watch from the corner of his eye. Something about this guy still set his teeth on edge. He let his mind settle into agent-mode. Was he bothered by Rose’s possible interest in an outsider, or was there actually something more concrete in his behavior tripping Jack’s danger alarms? 

Then--he caught it, the man was surveilling _him_ \--looking away just as Jack looked at him. So he’s determined Rose has someone watching out for her. Maybe he’s thinking she had to be removed from Jack’s view in order to get more agreeable.

Rose had been clear: she wanted to dance and maybe get a little drunk, but had no intention of going home with anyone. Jack wasn’t necessarily planning on stopping her if she changed her mind--as long as she was still sober, at least. She was a grown woman, clearly with some pent up needs, which the Doctor certainly wasn’t doing anything about. And in spite of their affection for each other, she wasn’t coming to Jack to start anything up either. (Besides, he valued his new situation on the TARDIS too much to risk getting thrown out on his ear, which he suspected might be where that would end.) So there they all sat at stalemate. 

And he was right--that alien danced Rose out of Jack’s field of vision. Time to check in. If Rose told him to get lost, he’d get lost, but he was definitely going to scope out the situation. He casually skirted the floor in time to the music (truly a beautiful variety of people here!). He found them in on the dark side of the back wall, the speckled alien in front of Rose with a hand oh-so-casually on the wall next to where she leaned, chest puffed, not _quite_ cornering her but close. Definitely attempting to look as alpha male as possible, in Jack’s opinion. Jack knew courting rituals in a lot of places and had pretty firm opinions about their relative merits. He had little patience with the ones that relied on pressure. 

Still--Rose talked animatedly and laughed at whatever he was saying into her ear, so she might be fine. And maybe she liked the guy and Jack should butt out? A breather couldn’t hurt--he’d let her decide. He maneuvered around the guy’s back and slid a deft arm between them, took Rose’s hand and tugged her out. 

“Hey, friend! Ready for our dance?” 

Rose winked at him and turned to the alien. “Sorry, um, Londred, right? I promised him! Maybe I’ll catch you later.” She favored him with a bright smile and turned back to Jack, who spun them back into the dance floor, not missing the decidedly unhappy look on Londred’s face. 

Rose leaned to Jack’s ear. “Thanks! He was a’right at first, but I was trying to have a conversation and he kept trying to talk me into getting out of here.” She rolled her eyes. 

Jack gave her a light squeeze. “Yeah, I didn’t like the guy.” 

“You wouldn’t! An’ the Doctor would hate him!” They both laughed. 

The opening notes of the next song rang out and Rose shouted, “Oh yeah!” at the same time as Jack’s “a classic!” and they dropped into the beat. 

Minutes later, stepping off the other side of the dance floor, Jack was surprised to find _Londred_ hovering, with a smile Jack found less handsome and more creepy all the time. 

“You are not her mate,” he said to Jack. 

“Yeah, I don’t think that’s the issue here.”

“Thanks, but--” Rose began. 

“You want to go with me.” His eyes fixed on Rose. “Yes?” 

“Look, I think it’s time you moved on,” she responded, and held Jack’s arm tighter. 

Londred’s face flashed over with anger, then settled into an insincere smile. He rubbed a hand down Rose’s forearm and looked at her eyes with a strange expectant look, then frowned again when she shook him off. 

Rose’s lip curled. “Jack, I wanna go now.” 

Londred reached again, grabbing at Rose as Jack whipped her around to his far side and came back wielding a small aerosol device. 

“Aaand, you’re done! Back. Off.” 

Eyes never leaving her, Londred lunged and seized Rose’s arm. She yelled and wrenched it away. Jack shoved him toward the nearest blank wall, and sprayed him in the face. A scream rose above the music and more commotion started when security came running. Jack pointed them toward the man now crumpling to the floor, and swept Rose out the door. 

  


“What the bloody hell was THAT about?” Rose asked, rubbing her shoulder.

“I think he wanted you to ‘go-with-him’.” Jack imitated the monotone delivery and Rose cracked up. 

“He got creepy in a hurry. Why do creepers have to ruin everything for everybody else?” 

“Oh, if only I could answer that question! You wanna try a different place?”

“Nah, we got some good dancing in. Though we didn’t say goodbye to anyone.”

“We might see them if we go back tomorrow.” 

“Oh?” Rose gave him a teasing look. 

“Surely the Doc’ll give us another night off. I might have a date.” 

“Ohh, get you! Got something goin’ while I wasn’t looking?”

“Hey, I work fast!” 

“Yeah, you do!” Rose hugged his arm. “ _Meanwhile_ , let’s go get drunk in the library. Put on Grease again or somethin’!”

Jack laughed. “Sounds like a plan!” 

  


And a good plan it was, right until the moment they burst through the TARDIS doors. 

The Doctor called out from under the grating, “Back already?” His head popped up, topped with his ridiculous headlamp (which had no right to be as attractive as it was). He looked at Rose with one of those indulgent closed-mouth smiles that made Jack want to laugh and scream. 

Rose inhaled loudly.

“Had all the fun we could stand,” Jack said, as Rose dug her nails into his forearm. 

“Missed me too much, I see!” 

The Doctor looked so happy. Jack was pretty sure this would be one of those nights he would come and hang out with them while they got silly. He should get the blender and make--

“Jack!” Rose hissed, and he finally properly looked at her. Her flushed face looked stricken. 

“Rose?”

“What’s happening to me…? I feel all…” She broke off and stared at Jack, open-mouthed. He could only gape. 

The Doctor climbed out of the grating, still chatting about something Jack now couldn’t focus on. 

Rose stared at the Doctor, then back at Jack, and mouthed, “Help me?” 

“Rosie, what is it?”

“Everything all right?” The Doctor’s face furrowed in confusion and he stepped toward them. 

Rose’s eyes fixed on the Doctor. “Oh, no! I--I can’t!!” she gasped, and turned and sprinted from the console room. 

The Doctor took a few steps toward the hall then whirled on Jack. “What did you do?” he shouted. 

“Nothing! She was fine--” 

“One job! Keep a young human entertained and safe for one night…” He stalked off after Rose. 

Jack stared, heart in his throat. What the hell? Could something else have happened that she didn’t tell him? 

  


The Doctor returned after a couple minutes, a bit flushed. “She won’t let me in.” 

“Doc, I honestly don’t know what happened. There was this weirdo bothering her at the club. He did grab her at one point after she told him to get lost, but I took care of it. That’s when we left, and I swear all the way home everything was normal!.” 

The Doctor glared, jaw tight. “And that was it? He didn’t hurt her?” 

“Well, she had to pull away from him, but I didn’t think so. We made fun of him and his stupid voice and then started making plans.” 

“She wants to see you. Go sort it.” 

“I--” he regarded the Doctor warily. “Got it.” 

As he passed, the Doctor grabbed his jacket. He hesitated, opened his mouth a couple times, then said, “Please let me know?” The anger had drained from his eyes leaving a vulnerability Jack rarely saw.

Jack nodded and patted his leather sleeve. “Yeah, of course.”

 

  


Rose flung the door open at his knock, and slammed it shut behind him. She dropped back onto her bed and crossed her legs. Jack sat carefully next to her. 

“Honey, listen, whatever it is--” 

“Something’s wrong with me! You have to help me.” She looked at her flexed hands and blew out a deep breath, controlling it. 

“Of course, tell me, whatever you need. You know, the Doc thinks I did something to you--” 

She grabbed at Jack’s tshirt. “I need...” Tears sprang from the corners of her eyes. “I need... _the Doctor_!”

“He was just _here_ and you sent him to get _me_!” Jack sputtered. “I can’t help you if you don’t tell me exactly what’s going on.”

She dropped her head to his shoulder. “I don’t even know how to say it--I _need_ him. I _want_ him. Ok, fine, I always want him, but I jus’ feel so strange. Do you understand what I mean? This isn’t natural.” 

Oh.

Jack pushed her back by the shoulders and took a long look. Cheeks flushed, décolletage flushed. A sheen of sweat glistening on her forehead and upper lip...lips, fuller than ever. If he’d been looking, which he was NOT, because he would firmly keep his understood boundaries, he’d have thought she never looked more alluring, more kissable. Her chest expanded as she sucked in each breath, and he suddenly noticed the hardness of her--

“Dammit, Jack!” She thumped his chest with her middle finger. “Focus! Do you have it too?” 

“No, I don’t!” He blinked. “I’m realizing how it’s affecting _you_. Actually, I think I know what’s happening here. Been awhile since I’ve seen something like this, but I should have guessed. Aphrodisiac.”

“But--that’s not a real thing? Is it?”

“Says the girl who lives in a time machine. It’s, uh, biotech. Manipulating adrenaline, dopamine, oxytocin. The Doctor could explain the science.” 

Rose wailed and threw herself back onto a pile of pillows. 

“In fact, I used to stop in at the Vega International Space Station where it was an underground recreational thing. Couples, usually. Supposed to be a good time, but I prefer natural chemistry, myself.” He winked and Rose glared.

“If you’re done going down memory lane, maybe you could help me figure this out. Kinda want to claw my face off right now to keep from going out there.”

“Ok, so it sounds like your mind has focused everything on the Doctor. And...I think that means something? About how you feel about him.” 

She covered her eyes and groaned.

“Hey, sweetheart, look at me.” Jack rolled onto a pillow next to her. “I already knew. It’s kind of obvious.” (She groaned again.) “Your feelings are nothing to be ashamed of. And besides, I think it protected you. Do you see what happened? That arsehole must have dosed you. That’s why he kept acting like touching your arm would get you to change your mind.”

“It didn’t. Didn’t even feel anything until I heard the Doctor’s voice.”

“See, you must have had a pretty powerful hormone cocktail already going in his direction, eh, eh?” He tapped her playfully and she finally smiled. “And the drug sort of focused it.” 

“Jack, ’m gonna crawl out of my skin! Ever have the feeling like you’re going to freak out about something and you stay real quiet thinking, ‘don’t start, don’t start,’ ‘cause if you make one move, you’ll completely lose it?” 

“I know what you mean.”

“’M tryin’ to keep calm, but it’s like all my nerves are on fire. ‘Specially, you know,” she waved a hand over her lower body. Jack nodded. “And I can’t go on. My mind is turnin’ circles. All these wishes. Like everything I’ve ever...fantasized...takin over my head. His voice, saying things, dirty things, to me, begging me. What he looks like underneath his clothes. His kiss. Oh my God, what would it be like to kiss him, like really snog?!” Her arm flung out and almost clobbered Jack and he caught her hand and squeezed it. 

“I know, honey, I know.”

“I’ll go take a shower, maybe, y’know, do something for myself. But it’s like I don’t even _want_ to do that.” Her voice cracked. “How long before it’s over?”

Jack thought back to his days on Vega and the people he’d known who indulged--including a couple unlucky ones who didn’t get to be with the ones they wanted. “Well, it’s over a lot faster if you’re burning it off with the object of your desire. A pretty great few hours! And as I recall they wouldn’t have much energy for a couple days afterward.” 

Rose shivered, whispering, “ _Oh, my God_.” Then sat up, “Whaddaya mean, ‘over a lot faster’? What if you don’t get the person you want?”

“If you don’t... _do_ anything about it--a couple days? Forty-eight hours, if it’s like the one I’m thinking of.” 

Rose wailed into her hands. “There’s no way. I can’t go on two days like this! What’s it been? Half an hour. I’m already thinking about how I need you to handcuff me here so I don’t go attack him, which only makes me think about handcuffs on the Doctor, like right here.” She pulled on two slats in the headboard. “Like, on his back, hands over his head, totally under my control...” 

Her soft voice had trailed off and she stared at the headboard for a minute, then seemed to snap out of it and looked at Jack with alarm. “This is the most embarrassing problem I’ve ever had!” Her face crumpled and she dropped to the duvet.

“Hey, hey, it’s ok. Seriously, he would want to help you out..”

“ _‘Help’_ me out! Ok, that sounds pathet--sounds sexy, actually. Shit. But that’s the worst thing that could _ever_ happen--if he only did it because I’d turned into some sex maniac! You can’t tell him.”

“Really? The worst thing? I can think of worse--”

“Shut _up,_ Jack! He’s not _like_ us! He’ll feel disgusted and...and _invaded_ to even suggest it and he’ll take me home first chance.”

Jack held her shoulders until she looked him in the eye. “He definitely will _not_ take you home. And, I don’t know if I should tell you this or not, but it might get worse before it starts getting better.”

Rose looked genuinely panicked now. “Ask the Doctor to knock me out for a couple days. Or I’ll _lose_ it! I’ll be stark raving bonkers!”

“I very much doubt he’ll agree to put you in a coma. It’s dangerous. And he especially won’t if he doesn’t know why.”

“Do not tell him! Swear it, Jack!” 

“I _can’t_ avoid telling him the general situation, no way. First of all, he’s out there waiting to hear you’re ok. I think you scared him when you wouldn’t let him in.”

“I know. I feel bad for yellin’ at him, but I couldn’t stand it.”

“Don’t worry about that. He can take it.” Jack sighed. “Then there’s the problem of some bloke running around using aphrodisiacs without consent. On Vega it’s not only illegal, it’s highly taboo--he’d have gotten his arse kicked by the crowd if he got caught.” 

“ _I_ wanna go kick his arse.” 

“We’re gonna have to go handle him. I’ll try to do it myself, since I’m afraid the Doctor would kill the guy and get arrested.”

Rose closed her eyes and flopped back against the headboard. “He won’t actually kill anybody.”

“For you? I’m not so sure.”

“He _won’t._ That’s not a problem. Ok, fine, if you have to tell what happened, but Jack, please, please, don’t tell him it’s _him_. I just can’t. I couldn’t live. Or look him in the face again.”

Jack exhaled a deep breath. “I _really_ think it’s ok--” 

“Promise me!”

“I promise to _try_ and handle this without telling him everything, ok? I’m gonna go talk to him. Go get the shower, see if it helps.”

  
TBC


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The trope is dubcon by definition. We handled with care, but please avoid if this is triggering. If you would like to know how exactly it will unfold to decide, click [here](http://chiaroscuroverse.tumblr.com/spoilers) for spoilers. :) 
> 
> RATING WILL GO UP

The Doctor circled the console, his agitation increasing with each unnecessary flip of a switch and loosening and tightening of a hex nut. Rose’s quavering voice echoed in his head: _“Go! Away!”_

He didn't want to think about how much it stung, so instead he stewed about how likely Jack was to blame for whatever upset her, and calculated the odds of his throwing Jack out the door and vanishing with Rose into the vortex. _Running about even at the moment._ Then it would be the two of them again. As it should be. They’d been just peachy before the _Captain_ and his antics, cracking jokes and flirting and being a...well, a pretty damn useful team member, honestly. But they didn’t need him, not really. 

He ignored a slight pang of impending loss and yanked on a lever. But the TARDIS flatly refused to let this lever budge and lightly shocked him when he put some muscle into it. He was considering the mallet when Jack returned. 

“Well?”

Jack looked nervous. “She’s fine. Or, will be fine. I think she got dosed with a love potion.”

The Doctor glared. “What?!”

“So the grabby alien guy, well, you know, alien to us, but I don’t think native to here. She was dancing with him for a while. Seemed to be having a good time.” He shrugged and the Doctor bit his tongue. “But she left him to dance with me and he turned back up acting really strange and touching her and seemed surprised she didn’t want to go with him.”

“But she was okay while you were there?” He filed away the mental image of this man touching Rose.

“Yeah. I think--it took some time to kick in?” 

The Doctor stared at the hallway. He should take her to the medbay, give her a scan. But then, depending on what sort of aphrodisiac they were working with, there was likely nothing but time to cure it. Well, time or...scratching the itch, and he wasn’t ready to think about that yet. 

“She won’t see me, Jack.” 

Jack didn’t meet his eyes, keeping them on the rise and fall of the time rotor. “She’s just, you know, feeling a little strange. A little embarrassed.”

“’It’s not her fault!” 

“She knows that. Still, it’s a weird situation. She’s trying to deal with it privately. You understand, right?”

“Right. ‘Course.” He didn’t, exactly.

He’d fixed her up from plenty of scrapes. She’d smile and call him “Dr Doctor” and he’d tell her she was grounded and moan about being forced into inaction the next day while she recovered in front of some classic movies and he tried to maintain a reasonable distance on the library couch. Even when he’d had to cut her clothes from her body to use the dermal regenerator, she hadn’t seemed bothered by it. (He’d steeled his mind in proper-doctor mode and only later thought about the softness of her skin. Maybe wished for one more handsbreadth worth of memory.) 

Something being wrong with her that he wasn’t _allowed_ to fix was making him itchy. 

Frustrated inaction lit up his nerves until the spark caught fire and he whirled around to Jack. “This man. Describe him!” 

Jack hesitated for only a moment. “Not too tall, speckled skin, like freckles, but dialed way up. Name’s Londred, Rose said. Pretty boy.” 

The Doctor snorted. _Figures._

“But best of all,” Jack bounded to the console and pulled an object from his pocket, “I think we can find him with this!” He dropped it with a triumphant smile. “Sprayed him in the face after he put his hands where they weren’t wanted. Aside from stinging like a bitch, it’ll make him glow in the dark _and_ I believe it has metals you can trace with your tech.” 

Flooded with relief, the Doctor grinned at him. “Good lad! Knew I kept you around for a reason!” He scanned the device with his sonic, plugged the sonic into the console, and examined the monitor. “Gotcha!” 

He stalked toward the door, but when Jack followed he waved him off. “I’m handlin’ it.” At Jack’s skeptical look, he added, “Can’t leave Rose alone, anyway, so you’ve got to stay. Just...take care of her, ok? Whatever she asks of you. Got it?” He fiddled with the screwdriver to avoid seeing Jack’s reaction to this statement, swallowed the lump in his throat, and focused on the soon-to-be-regretting-he-was-ever-born-alien. “Time to clean up!” 

“Doc, don’t kill him.” Jack jumped forward and clutched a handful of leather jacket. 

The Doctor turned and glanced pointedly at Jack’s hand and back to his eyes. “I’m a Time Lord. Don’t have to kill him, do I?” He smiled, but it felt more like a tight-lipped grimace. 

“Fine.” Jack let go. “Then don’t remove him from time and space or turn him into a eunuch five years ago. Rose is home safe. Nothing happened.”

“What do you think I am? Been knocking around for a bit--think I know how to handle meself.”

“Yeah, but it’s Rose.” Jack trailed off.

“And that’s why it ends here. Go--check on her. I won’t be long.” 

  


The Doctor was glad for the cool bite of the night air. Truth was, he had flashed through a not-small number of fantasies, including drop-kicking the bloke into the event horizon of a black hole. Thought he’d picked an easy target in a young Earth girl…

Having a mission was good, though. Curbed the urge to wreck some satisfyingly crunchy objects. He knew the layout of the central district of this city well enough to get around. He made a quick detour to visit some old acquaintances before setting off to the building the TARDIS had identified as containing the traces from Jack’s aerosol. 

Jack. 

Jack had done his job--watched her back. He wasn’t to blame for this situation either, and even if Jack and Rose bonded closer because of it, so be it. When he’d invited Jack to stay on board it was partly a reward, partly because he seemed to have that certain something the Doctor loved in humans, but not insignificantly because _Rose_ wanted him around. He hadn’t missed the sparks between Rose and Jack in 1941, but when they’d been trapped in that concrete room, she’d turned around and directed her full charms on _him_ , made the strongest come-on she probably dared. Damned if he’d had ten more minutes alone with her… 

Might it have been enough to smash his Time Lord reserve and all the very good reasons he maintained boundaries, and release a more primal, more _Gallifreyan_ , self? It was a thought that frequently accompanied him in long showers as he painstakingly reconstructed every meter of those rooms, every bit of furniture and concrete block in the wall. Every strand of golden hair flying around her face, which he could have whisked away before leaving a hand on her warm cheek and stroking a thumb across her mouth. Would she have leaned into his touch? Gone silent and parted her lips in anticipation of his kiss? A kiss that would have claimed her? And she would have been his....Rose. 

_His Rose_. 

And then she wouldn’t be shoving the Doctor off in favor of Jack Bloody Harkness when she was in a state and needed help. Bollocks.

He’d been doing his best not to dwell on what her state might be, exactly. He was familiar with types of aphrodisiacs and the people who liked to quaff them and make fools of themselves. He’d heard going unfulfilled was pretty uncomfortable. Painful, even? One of his goals was to get a sample from the tosser and figure out what he was dealing with. 

The last thing he wanted was to inflict his presence on Rose if it would make her even _more_ uncomfortable. She could be a bit defensive about her day-to-day human needs, which, fine, was probably his fault for griping about it so often. He never really meant it--was just chafing to be on with their travels--and quickly stuffed the thought that his casual putdowns of humans meant she couldn’t trust him with something like this. 

He honestly didn’t consider attending to sexual needs to be much different than anything else humans had to get up to on a regular basis. _(Or, well, he always had. Until Rose. Now his traitorous multiple-track mind deluged him with memories of time spent wondering what her specific needs might be and how she might like them satisfied.)_ Anyway, humans did what they needed to do and it didn’t make any difference to him except when it got in the way of a job. 

Jack on the other hand? Openly sexual, caring friend, proud of being a safe partner. He was the obvious choice for burning off a love potion. Jack wouldn’t hurt her or disappoint her. The Doctor’s gut churned as he stared at the dirty pavement disappearing under his feet, relying on proprioception to guide his steps. If it happened that way, he’d never mention it again and they’d all go back to normal. That is, unless they enjoyed themselves enough to start a regular thing. A shooting pain across his temple alerted him he was clenching his jaw much too hard. He loosened and stretched it with deliberate care as he rounded the last corner. 

Finally sprinting up the steps of the building and into the second floor hall, he waved the sonic across the doors until he found the right one. 

“Number 3. Get ready for a rude awakening.”

His boot stomped the door and it gave way with an _extremely_ satisfying crunch and bounced off the wall as the Doctor stepped through and slammed it shut. With one quick blast of the sonic, every light source in the room brightened. The pillock was passed out on the bed--alone, thankfully--and opening confused eyes when the Doctor grabbed him by the shirt and threw him onto the floor. 

Londred crab-walked back with a terrified look at the Doctor towering over him. “I have money. Take it--there!” He waved a hand vaguely. 

“You might be more of an imbecile than I was led to believe,” the Doctor commented lightly, crossing his arms. “But we’ll see. Think back to where you were two hours ago and see if any other possibilities cross your mind for what’s happenin’ now. Go on! I’ll give you a hint. That--” he circled a finger indicating the bright blue dye spattered across the man’s face, “really doesn’t suit your coloring.” 

“I--I had an incident. A misunderstanding! There is no need for violence!” He put on a reasonable face and carefully stood up, flinching slightly, as if expecting a pummeling fist at any moment. “Listen--”

“Oh, how rude, I haven’t introduced myself! Hello, I’m the Doctor!” He waved with a false smile. “ This is the part where I usually introduce my friends Rose and Jack, but I hear you’ve already met them, _Londred._ ”

Londred gaped. 

“Oh, yes, I checked your credentials at the intake station. Now, here’s what’s going to happen. We’re going to skip over all the denials. You know and I know and--” he paused and inclined an ear toward the door, where a rhythmic pounding was coming into earshot, and pointed, “ _they_ know you administered an aphrodisiac to an unconsenting party. On a Level 7 planet! You know what that means.” 

“Mercy. I plead mercy, sir, I didn’t know she was under your protection. Besides, it had no effect, so she was clearly lying about having no lover. Oh! It must be--”

“I believe I said I’m not interested in your paltry excuses!” the Doctor spat, lifting him by the collar like a rag doll. “All that tells me is that you thought she was fair game if no one _owned_ her. And trying to cast blame on her is pathetic.” He shoved him back toward the floor and spoke slowly. “Trust me when I say this _is_ mercy. You really don’t want to know what I could do to you.” 

He placed a boot on the man’s chest and closed his eyes. Engaged his higher senses, sought the string of timeline surrounding him, and pulled. Londred’s face froze into a mask of horror as time trapped him. The Doctor casually fiddled with sonic settings. Londred’s mouth opened in infinitesimal degrees into an attempt at a scream. The Doctor tested the candle-lighting-and-snuffing setting on the nearest sputtering candle, while the stomping footsteps grew louder. “Needs some fine tunin’,” he commented to Londred, still trapped in 30 seconds ago.

Fists pounded on the door. The Doctor released the frozen timeline. 

A gasp completed. “H-how?? What are you?” 

The Doctor bent at the waist and stared into his petrified eyes. “Time Lord.” He stood and took on a faux-patient tone. “Now get it out and open it.” 

He could have laughed at the terrified face gone deathly pale under spots and blue dye, but he was still too angry. He watched shaking hands--undeserving hands that had touched Rose--pull a small vial out of his pocket and unscrew the top. The Doctor stuck the sonic in the opening to sample all available chemical information, said “Ta,” swept to the door, and flung it open.

"Blo mo co jo!" Three Judoon stood in the hallway. 

“Hello!” The Doctor grinned widely at them. “Here’s your prisoner! Evidence is in his hands. Well, that’s me off! See you next time!” He sidestepped the leftmost rhinoceroid and breezed out. 

  


In the street, he’d expected his anger to be assuaged by the arrest, but relief wasn’t yet to be found. This man was no criminal mastermind, just another weak young male who happened to be in possession of a weapon, the cause of so much misery the universe over. Disgusting is what it was. The thought of Rose, succumbed to the potion, begging at the feet of this dunce, her will not her own…

 _That_ hadn’t happened, first and foremost, thanks to Jack getting in between her and her would-be violator. True, they were better as a team, watching each other’s backs. 

He strode into the TARDIS. No one in sight. No matter, he had work to do in the medbay. After that… He’d have to trust Jack to let him know if he was needed for anything. Rose could be suffering at this moment. Or Jack might be easing her pain. He didn’t know which was worse. _Stop it_ , he told himself. It was far better she not suffer, so long as it was her choice, or at least the best she could make under the circumstances. And she was _here_. Safe. Hell, she might get a fun night out of it. There was a reason for the popularity of love potions. 

He was surprised that even intrusive images of Jack and Rose together didn’t make him angry. Just...melancholy. He scoffed at himself while yanking open drawers, checking supplies he might not even need. On a daily basis now his ship was more full of life than he’d ever imagined could happen again for him, and here he was feeling _rejected_ in the most surprising way. He rolled his shoulders, trying to physically cast off the aching in his hearts. What they decided to do was none of his business, really. All he wanted was Rose happy again. 

He plugged his sonic into the medbay scanner and waited for the analysis to come on screen. 

“How’d it go?” Jack appeared in the doorway. 

The Doctor purposely did not look Jack up and down, merely registered his entire appearance in peripheral vision before focusing back on his screen. “Sorted.” Jack was in his plain tshirt and trousers, jacket gone. _Very James Dean_ , the Doctor thought ruefully. His hair was ruffled some, but not nearly as much as when he’d come strolling in at breakfast time from a night out. 

Jack seemed to accept that would be the final word on the perpetrator. He squinted at the screen, hovering over the Doctor’s shoulder. 

The Doctor side-eyed him. “How’s your circular Gallifreyan?” 

“Fine,” Jack gave a short laugh and leaned back against the examination table. “Carry on!” 

But the Doctor had gotten a waft of the ineffable scent of _Rose_ coming off Jack. His fingers tightened on the edge of the computer table. Not quite...enough...to indicate what he feared most--no, not feared--wondered. He should know, though, for medical reasons. 

“Listen, Jack, I want to thank you. You kept her safe.” He ignored the doubtful sound Jack made. “S’what I asked you to do. You were prepared, so I found him easily.” 

“I didn’t stop her from getting dosed in the first place.”

The Doctor turned around to see Jack’s guilt-stricken face. “Things happen. _People_ choose to do things. Your instincts were good. Hers too. Knew when it was time to get out.” He squeezed Jack’s shoulder. “You did good.” 

Jack’s mouth quirked down, but he shook it off. He met the Doctor’s eyes and smiled. “Thanks.”

“How is she?”

Jack rubbed his hands over his face. “Not good, honestly. I mean, you know how these things work?” 

“Got a fair idea.”

“It’s getting worse. The...symptoms. And it’s starting to get painful. I don’t know the science of it, but she said it’s like having to sit still while her whole body is a magnet constantly pulling toward another magnet. She isn’t able to get any relief by herself.”

The Doctor lifted one crossed arm to stroke his chin. “It’s time to present her the options, if you haven’t already.” 

“What are the options? You get anything there?” He nodded at the readout. 

“Hormone-based nanotechnology. Adapts to each user’s brain and biochemistry. Keeps escalating their own levels of sexual reactions. It’s supposed to get used up and dissolve in the process, though if unresolved it would break down more slowly.”

“Sounds like this thing called Looking Glass that was around when I was on Vega with the Time Agency. Kind of a party drug, for most. I heard if it didn’t get used up it took a couple days to get over it.”

“Yeah, two days is pretty good guess. Trying to counteract can have unpredictable results. Probably. I could try? Could make it worse before it gets better.” He rubbed his eyes. “Looking Glass?”

“ _‘It Reveals_ ’,” Jack said in a mocking voice, waving jazz hands.

The Doctor gave a disapproving grunt. 

“She asked about being knocked out for the duration of it.” 

“A medically induced coma? Needs to be be worth the risk. I could do something telepathically--might be her best bet. But if she doesn’t want me near her room, she’s not likely to want me inside her head. Bigger problem is the adaptations might wait around until she’s conscious again to burn off.”

“So we’re left with wait, or…”

“Yeah. _Or_.” He took a breath, and said firmly, “You’ve got to offer to help her, Jack.” 

“Me?!” 

“Of course _you_! You care about her. She trusts you. I’ve seen enough to know you’re conscientious and take care of feelings. You ought to be good at it by now, all the practice you get--”

“Doc…” Jack hopped up on the exam table. 

“She’s lucky you’re here for this situation. Well, could take her back to _Rickey_ \--” he couldn’t help but give the name a derisive twist. “She must have liked him well enough to do it before, might be a comfort.” He couldn’t decide whether to like this idea better or worse than Jack. Wasn’t up to him, regardless. Whoever Rose wanted, she’d get. The smug visage of Adam floated before his eyes. Not bringing up that option! At the stab of annoyance Adam provided, he slammed a drawer and pointed a finger at Jack. “Don’t try to tell me you’ve got standards she doesn’t meet, because you’d actually be the luckiest bastard on this side of the known universe.”

“Wow! Ok, trust me, if she wanted me, I’d be honored. Less than delighted by the circumstances, but, sure, we’ve had an attraction and I’d do anything in my power to make it a happy experience. I just don’t think it would work.” 

“You’ve offered?”

“Well, she knows I would.”

“And she refused you? Rather take the pain than shag her good mate?”

Jack sighed heavily. “We’ve been in close proximity. You’re not listening to me: _I can’t help her_! Why don’t you study some more, hmm?” He waved back at the screen. 

“I’m getting the distinct whiff of information being withheld from me and I don’t like it.” He turned back to the details on the screen. “Luckily, I’m a genius.” 

Jack laughed. “You sure about that?”

The Doctor ignored him. “Nanobiotechology, attaches to free-flowing systemic hormones, multiplies, stimulates endocrine glands to increase...well, now this factor here would be individualised.” He trailed off, picturing the web of human veins, nerves, endocrine glands, all directed by a brain more complex than humans were even aware of, a superstructure of mind so few of them even had the capacity to access. If the mind had a focus already, a direction…

He turned around and looked at Jack, felt his mouth falling open. “I--” 

Jack raised his eyebrows. 

Back to the monitor. He murmured, “It didn’t work on her.” _She said she had no lover._ Back to Jack. “She already had a focus.”

“Ya know, one time Rose did a great impression of you the night you first met, not getting that the London Eye was a transmitter. Looked just like you look right now.” 

The Doctor scowled.

“And moment over.” Jack leaned back on his elbows and caught the Doctor’s eyes with what started as a teasing smile, but turned expectant. 

The Doctor’s mouth went dry. He didn’t dare think this, but he said it anyway. “She’s in love.” 

“I didn’t say it.”

“And _you_ can’t help her. And there’s no one at home she wants, even I can be sure of that.”

“I’m just here waiting for you to sort it out. But so is she. And _she’s_ in pain.”

“You won’t tell me.”

“Nope.”

“Because she doesn’t want you to.”

“Because the two of you are damned ridiculous. Which most of the time doesn’t matter too much, but now...”

“She wouldn’t see _me_. Because it was too hard for her?”

“In more ways than one.” 

The rushing of a double-pulse got louder. “Because it’s me?” His voice sounded high and strange in his own ears.

“You’re killing me. How could you possibly--of course it’s you! I wish _you_ could see the way you look at each other though my eyes one time--”

“But strong enough to redirect the drug?”

“Ok, I’ll beg forgiveness later for anything else I say, because you’ve already figured it out, and I really think I’m right, but yes, all of that, yes. Just imagine it’s possible for a minute and think about it, Big Time Lord Brain.”

Jack’s voice faded, and the Doctor was taking Rose’s hands in 1941 again. _A tongue-touched smile: “You’ve got the moves? Show me your moves,” and they stepped into an elevator to floor 500, the two of them happily together again, and she smiled like sunshine and bumped him with her hip, and two days ago, he caught her glazed-eyed in the jump seat waiting for him, flushing scarlet when he said, “Penny for ‘em?’_

Oh. _Oh._

He stammered, “I-I have to go to her. I have to take care of her!” 

“Thank you for putting it like that--that image’ll keep me warm on lonely nights! But--I need you to think something through before you go rushing down there.” 

“But if she--” He couldn’t say it. Not yet. “Why did she push me away? She must know I…”

“That’s just it, Doc, she _doesn’t_ know. She thinks if you helped her out, you’d only be doing it out of a sense of obligation or _pity_ , even. She’d rather put herself through two days of hell than suffer the humiliation and not be able to look you in the eye afterwards.”

“That’s bollocks.”

“Think about it from her perspective. You’ve, what, hinted around at a previous sex life? But you don’t act like you want it now.”

“Don’t _need_ it. Not the same for me as most humans.”

“But you want her.” Jack didn’t say it like a question. 

Want her? 

Like a desert wanted rain. 

The force of his want usually terrified him, on her behalf. He’d borne it alone, willingly--the craving itself was its own kind of pleasure. And worth it for every nanosecond of her company. 

Oh, Jack was still talking. “She’s exposed. Very, very exposed right now. And it’s so much more than being overwhelmingly aroused by...hormonal nanobots. She doesn’t think you want her like that, and she doesn’t know what’s here--” Jack patted his chest.

“Ok. Ok, I understand. Have to show her, don’t I?” He was almost whispering. “I will.” The surge of hope was too close to unbearable. 

As he turned on his heel to walk out the door he heard Jack flop to the table. “Don’t screw up! God, I hope this works.” 

_TBC_


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonus for subscribers - an early posting! ;) See warnings in ch. 1

Maybe “hurt” wasn’t the right word.

Rose had told Jack it was starting to hurt, and since then she’d had plenty of time on her own to consider every single detail of her peculiar affliction. The aching arousal itself wasn’t exactly a hurt. Pleasurable, in its own way, though frustrating as hell. No relief to be found. She’d had a shower, with all the hand-held, movable sprays and body jets, and she got nothing but very, very clean. Back in bed, hair wet but unwashed, wearing only knickers with a short dressing gown thrown over, it became clear: No satisfaction. Not today.

But the hurt? That was something else. She could exist day after day with a longing for him--that was the energy underlying her daily existence. See the stars, save the world, luxuriate in holding hands with a 900 year old alien she’d never hope to understand. Save the world, see the distant past, catch his eyes alight with joy and ever-so-fleeting glimmers of something more like what she was accustomed to from human men.

But he wasn’t human, as he was always so quick to remind her. Wishful thinking, probably. Can’t see what he does and assume normal bloke stuff. And most of the time that was _fine_. She could live a more amazing life than she’d ever dreamed, with the most amazing man. Be special to him. Needed. Love him...in whatever way he allowed her. It was all worth it, and most of the time staying in that in-between space was nothing but joy.

Until now. Now she was desperate to touch him; knowing he would never touch her back in the way she craved was agony. She was trying not to listen to the devil on her shoulder, which sometimes spoke in Jack’s voice, that he _would_ if she asked him to.

She spent a long time on this ship thinking he might not even _do_ that. Then came the night they found Jack and he’d made a joke of “dancing”, and let her know she’d thought wrong. And he looked at her _like that_ and she’d been so sure he wanted to kiss her. Then it was all saving people and joyful celebration in the console room, and a new team member, and jumping straight into the next adventure. The moment had passed and she was once again convinced it just wasn’t part of his makeup. That was their life.

This was something else.

_Give in_ , part of her begged, _ask him_. What if he said _yes_ , crawled into her bed, put his cooling hands on her burning hot skin? What if he kissed her the way she dreamed of? Let her kiss his jawline and neck and more of him she’d never seen but spent a lot of time imagining?

But she wasn’t so gone that she couldn’t imagine it all gone wrong. Hesitation in his eyes, a perfunctory kiss, a vague discomfort. She saw herself staring at the coral twisting to the high ceiling while he quietly moved inside her, face turned away. Would she fall apart at his touch and beg him for something he couldn’t give? What if he never looked at her the same way again once he’d seen her like this? That simple purity of whatever they were to each other would be broken. She pictured him dropping her off at home after months of trying to get past it. Or worse, her asking to leave because she couldn’t bear to live on the other side of the hope that used to bring so much joy to her life.

Tears streamed down her cheeks. It was all so terribly unfair. Maybe she should ask Jack to really try with her. He’d held her a bit, for comfort mostly, and asked her if she felt anything. Affection, yes, but it didn’t tamp down the longing to run for the console room and throw herself at the Doctor. But maybe if she put some serious effort into it…Jack could get past this. He was a master of casual sex. They’d still be friends.

She indulged the thought for a while and slammed a heel on the bed in frustration. Under normal circumstances she was pretty sure she could conjure a nice enjoyable fantasy involving Jack, but now there was dead nothing.

Unfair.

The only option was to ride this out, unless the Doctor came up with a cure. Jack had seemed doubtful when he left to talk to him. She tried to concentrate on revenge fantasies about the one who was responsible for putting her in this mess. That _fucking arse_ \--she’d thought he was cute and had such a good time with him, enough to make her consider that maybe she should try again to distract herself from foolish human notions about the Doctor with another boy. God, she could pick ‘em. At this point, they should walk into a place, see who Rose finds attractive, and immediately have him arrested, since he’s bound to be up to some kind of trouble.

She imagined roundhouse-kicking Londred in the face. A time or two. They were in a time machine. In truth, they could probably do more damage than that. She shook off thoughts of timelines and reapers. And with that, memories of the Doctor’s hand cupping her cheek and crushing her to him in a full body hug came crashing back through her whole body and she groaned out loud.

Three smooth taps sounded on the door. And silence. Her heart leapt into her throat. Jack would have called out while opening the door.

“Rose?”

Shit.

“S’me. Um, the Doctor.”

His voice…

She could almost taste it.

“I won't come in, promise, ‘less you say so. Will you just let me know you can hear me?”

She steeled her voice. “I'm here.”

“M sorry for coming again after you sent me away. There's been...developments. I'd like to talk to you for a bit, if you'll allow me.”

She heard him lean heavily on the door.

“I caught the man responsible for this.”

“What happened?” She spoke with careful lightness. “I told Jack you wouldn't kill him.”

“He's with the proper authorities. Might have put the fear of the Time Lords into him.”

She laughed bitterly. “Good.”

“Yeah, it was.” He was quiet for a long moment. “Did some analysis on the compound. It’s nanotechnology, tailors itself pretty strongly to the individual. I don't think I can counteract it safely, at least not before it would wear itself out anyway.”

_He’s so close._ “Thanks. For trying. I’ll be fine.”

He didn’t leave. She heard him slide to the floor. A light thump that was probably his head falling against the door.

“Can I tell you a story? You usually like my stories so much you fall asleep before I get to the end.”

She smiled and blinked away tears. “Dunno if that’ll work today.”

“Don’t sell yourself short. Champion sleeper, you. ‘S a wonder we ever get anywhere.” His light tone was a touch too deliberate, and she could feel the worry underneath. He paused again. “Listen, Rose, I can guess how you must be feeling and I’m so, so very sorry. That I wasn’t there--”

“Experienced the wonders of love potions yourself? In your _dancing_ days?” It came out a little more bitter sounding than she meant.

“Not that I recall right off, but to tell the truth, there’s quite a few days of my life that have vanished, especially right before the war. Had my memory cleared more’n a few times. By me or someone else.” He gave a short chuckle. “Sometimes have to protect me from my own self--one hazard of being a time traveler.”

She reminded herself she should really tell him to go. The brick wall of her resolve crumbled with every word he spoke, and she could hardly concentrate on _what_ he was saying, with the timbre of his voice rolling up and down her spine.

The devil on her shoulder spoke again, told her she was being ridiculous. He could never send her home no matter what happened. _Just ask him. Say: help me, Doctor._ He was probably touch-starved anyway, the way he took her hand at every opportunity, and the way she’d feel him slightly shiver when she brushed against him while he sat on her bed next to her, on top of the covers, telling her about Ice Warriors or some other civilization much farther from home. It could never be the same for him as for her, but she could be something more to him. Maybe he’d--

In a wave of panic, she clutched at her side table for what she’d begged Jack to bring to protect her from herself. She clicked a handcuff around one wrist and the other to a headboard bar. She tested it a bit, wondered how hard she’d have to pull before she broke the bar, and threw the key across the room. It clanked off the wall not far from the door.

“Rose? Everything ok?”

“M’ok. Yeah, tell me a story.”

“Works better without a door.”

“No! I mean--just try, yeah? Not exactly...company ready right now.”

A pause. “Okay.”

She decided to be brave. Have a conversation. “Makes sense you’d forget a lot over 900 years. Not like I can remember everythin’ from secondary school.”

“You lot can’t get your heads around hundreds of years. That’s no knock on your human brains, by the way. This time.” She could feel his smile. “Only natural you’d assume Time Lords experience passage of time the same way you do. Doesn’t really happen like that, though. It’s all in there. Can be stretched or shrunk or brightened or faded depending on what we need, ‘less something’s happened to us. To be fair, things happen to me a lot.

“I’ve met many amazing people in my life. In all my travels. They’re across the whole universe. I never tire of them, even when I should. Traveled with a lot of people, too. They stay for a while and then they go.”

Her gut clenched and she was suddenly terrified that he was here to let her down easy, tell her this was it, they’d had fun, _thanks for the company, time to go back to your mum_. If that’s true, said her devil, best get a shag out of him first, make this all go away.

Wait. _Is that what he’s doing?_ Would he offer her help as a sendoff?

“Fuck that,” she whispered. White hot fury suddenly crowded out all her other emotions. A moment later she realized anger alleviated the hunger, and leaned into the idea. How dare he? After everything they’ve done together.

“Out with it, already!” she yelled toward the door.

“What?”

“You came here to say somethin’--go on and say it!”

“I’m trying to--thinking about what to say next! Why are you shoutin’ at me?”

The anger crashed and the visceral longing dropped solidly into its place. She tried to keep the sob out of her voice, but failed. “If you’re planning to take me home, tell me _now_ so I can make a rational decision--”

“What in the name of Rassilon are you on about?”

“Feels like you’re leading up to something and if it’s gonna end in me having to leave you, just say it!” Another adrenaline spike. It felt strong, clarifying.

“No! That’s not--you’re talking nonsense. Does your head feel cloudy? I need to know if you’re having any more symptoms--”

“Oh, my _God_ , Doctor! ‘M not crazy!”

“That’s not what I mean.” He stopped and she could hear a deep inhale. “Will you please listen to me? Trust me that I’m not plannin’ to send you away. Never. I _never_ would.” The fleeting tremor in his voice made her shiver. “No matter what happens now, it’s all going to be ok. Do you believe me?”

She blew out a few breaths. “Not yet.”

“Fair enough.”

He shifted against the door, which made her visualize his body again. She remembered the first time she was surprised by his strength, when he lifted her to the top of a short rock wall and set her on her feet like it was nothing. He could sling her over his shoulder if he wanted to, throw her on a bed, hold her against a wall, arms under her thighs… Maybe a simple touch would be ok. She could ask for a hug?

The magnet-pull that had slacked when she was angry washed back over her, but it was only when her arm jerked back that she became aware she’d slid off the bed, leaving her cuffed hand behind. She was suddenly thankful she’d decided to prevent herself from going out there.

“S’just, for someone always prying for more of my life stories, you cut me off quick.” He was trying to tease now, make it feel normal.

“I do _not_ pry!”

“Oh, sure! ‘Doctor, what’s this for?’ ‘Doctor, why d’ya have a room full of yarn and recorders.’ ‘Doctor, so you _do_ dance.’”

“You’re the one who brought that up. And your Rose-voice is daft.” _Dancing around the console. What if when he dipped her he’d leaned over and put his lips to her exposed throat?_ She pulled her knees to her chest. How many more hours of this?

“Too high? Eh, I’d never do it justice. In my head it’s perfectly replicated.”

“And what does the Rose in your head say to you?”

“Ah.” She heard a thump. “If you only knew. Now, can you stop worrying and _really_ listen to me?”

“I can listen. I want to.” _So, so much._ “And I’ll try on the worryin’ part.”

He was quiet a long moment. Preparing himself? She missed his voice every moment he wasn’t talking. How mental was that?

“Never quite got on as a good Time Lord for a lot of reasons. Always complicated with them. My people. Before the war. And after the war. After becoming a dutiful soldier--” his voice twisted on the word, “my reward was losing everyone. And not being able to look at myself in a mirror.”

The steady thrum of desire was momentarily awash in sympathy. If she could just hold him, kiss him, ease his pain for a moment…

“I got used to having to do the hard things, take the responsibility. But, well, I can’t get into what it was like wakin’ up, still here, with no one, but I stopped workin’ too hard at being careful with my personal safety. I’m not easy to kill, but eventually--”

“Stop it! Don’t talk like that.”

“That’s when the last thing I ever expected happened. I had to go save the Earth, _again_ , and I had a nice trap set, and there I found….you, Rose Tyler. Wandered off into an alien invasion, typical.”

“Oi,” she objected, but lightly, heartbeat picking up speed.

“What I said about my memories always bein’ there for the taking, well, if I want to I can brighten and stay in that moment I took your hand and told you to run, the moment you turned and met my eyes. When I got so shaken I decided to make a small change to ensure I’d get out of that basement, though it meant I’d have to work harder to find the Nestene base. And if it meant I might have to find you again, for the sake of the Earth, of course, guess I would.”

“Y-you _wanted_ to find me again?” She was annoyed at her voice going wobbly.

“Kept thinking I’d shake it off--shake _you_ off--and be ready to move on again. But a funny thing happened along the way. It started to be fun again.”

“Fun?”

“Savin’ the world. Suddenly, there’s you--pulling me inside your flat, wrestlin’ an arm with me, and swinging on a chain to save me. An’ it was _fun_. Could search my memories and figure out when I’d last had a laugh, but I don’t think I want to know the answer.”

“Doctor…”

“Nevermind about that. My point is that when I was sure my life was over, it unexpectedly began again. You came _with_ me. And what I want more than anything is for you to stay.”

“Oh.” A small seed rooted in her mind: _what if, what if_ ? “I wanna stay. With you. But I think I know why you’re telling me this now, when I’ve got nano-whatsits in my bloodstream making me...like _this_.”

“I’m telling you this now because you might be feeling exposed. And you shouldn’t feel alone. Just because of what happened. I want you to see me too.”

“You want to help me. Because you care about me and I helped you. I understand.”

“Not yet you don’t. Yes, that’s true, but that’s not all.”

Tears fell to her knees, and she lifted her head. “You’ve figured it out, haven’t you? Why I didn’t want you here. So there’s no point in hiding anymore. I don’t even want to hide from you. It’s--I don’t wanna do something foolish and never be able to show my face again.”

“That’s not going to happen. I understand what you’re dealing with. It’s not your fault and there’s nothing that will make me think different about you.” His gentle voice made her want to burrow into it. “I’m going to ask you again to open the door. Can you meet me halfway and look at me? Please, Rose, see me how I see you.”

She nodded to herself. _Okay. S’ok. You can handle this._ She wiped her eyes with her free hand. “All right. But I want you to stay over there. And you’re gonna have to open it yourself.”

“Okay. Here goes.” The door slowly swung inward.

He’d never been so beautiful.

The Doctor was sat on his coat, one cheek slightly pink like he’d been resting it on the door. His maroon jumper wasn’t the same one he was wearing before, because every detail of his appearance when she stepped through the TARDIS doors was like an afterimage on the back of her eyelids. He pushed the door all the way to the wall and met her eyes as he crawled over the threshold, face as open as she’d ever seen it, but it fell as he noticed her arm.

“Now, what have you gone and done?” He sat up and made as if to come toward her but hesitated.

“Um, yeah, needed some insurance.” She rattled the handcuff chain. “See, I won’t attack you!”

He only frowned. “You should let me check on that.”

“M’ok.” She flung a “stop” hand toward him. “Just stay there, yeah?”

He looked dubious but assented. “Deal’s a deal. I’ll be over here.” He pushed the door shut and rolled on his elbow on the plush carpet. Stretched out on his side with one leg up in that way of his that made her think about crawling on top of him even on a normal day. The soft lamplight from her room fell across his face. “Though I don’t think you’re as comfy as I am.”

She chewed at her lip, kept him only in peripheral vision, and concentrated on keeping her wits. She’d be more comfortable _on_ him. She did feel completely exposed now. _Inhale, exhale._ “Since when do you walk around the TARDIS barefoot?”

He shrugged. “Left my boots out there. Sort of wanted to be less formal. Will you let me..?” He made a sonicking motion at her hand. “M not worried about you attacking me. S’what I’m trying to tell you.”

She huffed lightly and shook her head.

“You look beautiful, though.”

She focused on him. He actually looked nervous. She tried to run a hand through her tangled hair. “I’m a mess.”

“I wish so much you didn’t have tears in your eyes. You’re hurting and it’s all my fault.”

“No, it’s not your fault. I’m the one that was flirting with ‘im. Danced with him. Playing around to distract myself from thinking about _you._ ” Her voice broke. “Might as well say it, now everybody knows. I’m a silly human having silly human thoughts about someone who isn’t human. As usual.”

“No, no. First of all, you love to dance and I want you to dance whenever and wherever you want. But it’s my fault that you felt you needed a distraction. If I wasn’t such a coward--” He stopped, rolling forward onto his hands and knees. His eyes locked on hers and it was almost too much to bear. Any closer and she could probably smell him. A shudder went through her at the thought.

“Okay, that’s far enough. What are you trying to say?”

“I’m saying that if I’d told you before how I felt about you, you might not have thought you needed to go looking for a pretty boy. Maybe you’d want to be distracted by me? And maybe even if you did go out and dance, and this same thing happened, you wouldn’t have had to spend all these hours suffering.”

Her mouth hung open. She heard herself making a small sound in her throat. He hadn’t moved, but she was closer, and the pain in her wrist reminded her that she was the one leaning in. “Um. Why?”

“Because you could have come right to _me_ and I would have taken care of you. Because I would have already told you how much I want you. Every day. All the time. That to me you are--” and he said several flowing syllables that the TARDIS didn’t translate.

She could only whisper, heart in her throat. “What is that?”

“In English it means that I’m in love with you, Rose Tyler. Translates, best I can explain--” His head dropped and his hand clutched at the plush carpet so tightly his knuckles turned white. She watched his chest expand, one breath, another, until he looked back at her. “You are and were and will be my second heart.”

She stared from his eyes to his mouth, where he’d formed the words that now echoed in her ears along with her heavy pulse. She tried to speak and her voice broke. “Oh. Oh, Doctor.” The ache to touch him now so intense she was afraid to move. She dropped her gaze to the shoulder muscle flexing under his jumper as he moved again, slowly, like he didn’t want to startle her.

Another tear slid down her cheek.

“You’ve been feeling alone but you’re not. I’m so sorry, that it took something awful happening to you for me to tell you the truth. I-I just couldn’t believe you could love me the way I loved you. Couldn’t inflict myself and everything I’ve done on you like that.”

“Don’t talk like that. You’re not like that,” she mumbled, still reeling.

“Hey.” He sat on his heels and spoke softly. “Look at your hand. You’re hurting yourself.”

It was true, her body never stopped straining toward him of its own accord.

He put his fists on the floor in front of him, coiled energy. “Rose, before all this, if you’d known how I felt, would you have chosen to be with me?”

“Yes. Didn’t think it was possible, but I would have. Wanted you every day.”

“Please, will you let me take care of you--let me make love to you--here, now? It’s not how we would have chosen but we’re here.”

She nodded. He stayed still--oh--waiting for her to say it out loud, to speak her wish into reality. “Yes, yes okay.”

In one fluid motion he whipped the sonic from his trouser pocket, aimed it at the headboard, and crawled, catching her as the handcuff released and she pitched forward. A cry of pure relief rose through her as her head fell to his chest.

He released the other cuff and it clattered onto the carpet along with the discarded sonic. He raised her hand and examined her wrist, then bent to press gentle kisses along the bruised flesh. She shivered.

His grip got tighter and she saw his whole body tense. He lifted his head slightly, but his eyelids stayed squeezed shut, nostrils flared, and she watched his cheek hollow as his jaw clenched.

Her heart skipped. “What’s wrong? Oh!” He had a bulge in his trousers…a large one. She tried to drag her eyes away from it, only managing when the Doctor exhaled slowly and opened his eyes.

“How have you been managing to fight this?” he gasped, “I’m only getting a fraction--compromising respiratory bypass--and I can barely hold on.”

“I don’t understand!”

“Pheromones, the overproduction, it’s pouring off of you. Most of the time I can control how I react to you,” he pressed his nose into her hair. “You--you smell so good!”

“Doctor, what’s happening?”

“Side effects--don’t you see? Look at me.” He tilted her chin with his hand. “It made you crave the one you already wanted, and I’m getting sor’of a secondhand dose coming through your pheromones, because of my, well--”

“If you say superior biology...”

“The point is only _you_ could have this effect on me. It pushed you toward me and it’s pulling me back to you.” He dropped his forehead to hers. “Do you understand?”

“Because you _do_ love me? That much? I was afraid…to lose it completely, be too human or something, that you might be put off, I dunno, sounds....” she trailed off, eyes closed, and breathed in his scent. She realized her fingernails were digging into the wool covering his arms and snatched them away, murmuring “sorry.”

“Shh, s’ok. I know what you need.” He stood and whipped off his jumper. She wobbled at the sudden loss of his anchoring presence. “Come ‘ere.” He took her hand, pulled her to her feet, and laid both of her palms gently on his bare chest. “Better?”

“Yeah, yeah, much better.” She inhaled deeply, her lungs seeming to fill all the way for the first time in hours. Her fingers spread out on his skin, soaking him in, relief shimmering across her nerve endings. She glanced back at him and faltered at the intensity in his gaze.

He cupped both cheeks, wiping her tears with his thumbs, and brushed the corner of her mouth with his. Voice rough in a way she’d never heard before, he said, “I’ve got you, Rose. Let go.”

She let out a sob as as his mouth covered hers.

_TBC_

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time for the rating change! See notes in Chapter 1 for warnings.

The Doctor’s lips were velvety soft, as were his hands on each side of her face, and his fingertips that tangled into her hair and lightly stroked, sending shivers down her neck. Rose’s hands scrabbled at his bare chest, seeking an anchor. He tilted her head, opened his mouth over hers, tasted her tongue, and plunged in greedily. She whimpered when he broke away to capture each lip in turn, then seal over her again. Her arms snaked around his neck and pulled him to her with all the strength in her body. 

He dropped his hands from her face, and she had a moment to miss them before he grabbed her bum possessively, wrenching her against his groin. She cried out and pushed at him--wanted to push him over, climb him, but he stood like a fortress. She settled for using her hold on his neck and the leverage of his hands to jump into his arms and wrap her legs around his hips. He caught her, his arms like iron, anchoring her to his body. _Still not close enough._ But now she could hold his face and look at his half-lidded eyes and kiss all over him to her heart’s content. Her fingers threaded through the soft hair on the back of his head. She scraped her cheek along his rough stubble, humming, and caught his mouth, open on a breath, slid her tongue against his, falling quickly into a rhythm with him that turned her blood to molten lava. 

She felt more than heard him groan and she was slammed against something, breath whooshing out of her. The wall. She inhaled as the Doctor pressed into her and took back control of the kiss. His humming pleasured sounds vibrated under her body. She wanted to cry with delight, and yet it still wasn’t quite...enough, for reasons she was having trouble getting her mind to identify until he moved again--her clothes. The satiny fabric of her dressing gown pulled and twisted uncomfortably tight and interrupted the skin contact she craved. When he broke away from her mouth again to nip hungrily down the side of her neck, she wriggled and shoved at his shoulders.

“Doctor. Doctor, help me.” 

He didn’t seem to hear her, and for a moment she forgot, because she’d somehow shifted him into the perfect spot. His erection rode against her knickers, creating a surge of pure pleasure that that made her wild to pull him inside her. She followed his lead as he rolled his hips against her, groaning “Rose” into her neck, and responded with sounds of her own, tension building until she was sure it might happen just like this, rutting on each other against her bedroom wall. But the cold metal of his belt buckle on her belly reminded her the damn clothes were in the way. When his teeth sank into her collarbone, she shrieked--and he froze. His arms quivered slightly under her and he lifted his head, face concerned and a bit abashed. 

“Are you ok? M’sorry, I forgot myself…” 

“No, no, I loved that, actually.” She smiled and kissed his cheekbone. “S’just, I need more...um, more touch.” She yanked on her offending gown.

He stared confusedly for a second, then grinned and eased her to the floor, one shaky leg at a time. He eagerly went to work on the small knot that had formed in the belt of her gown, barely holding the two sides together. When it fell open, he reverently swept one side off her shoulder, then the other, until it fluttered to her feet. 

“Beautiful.” His eyes fixed on her chest. 

She trembled and swayed a little. He was too many inches away again--too many seconds spent not touching her, and she fought back a sudden panicked feeling. “Don’t leave me!” 

“Not going anywhere, me.” He grazed an open palm across one breast. “Let the universe implode.” 

His second hand followed suit, and her nipples tightened in the wake and she gasped. He looked pleased, and went back across with his thumbs.

She started to shake. “Doctor, I need you.” She grabbed for his belt buckle and managed to fumble it open. “I mean...more skin!” She plunged her hands into his trousers, but only brushed across the bulge, instead sliding her palms to the flesh of his thighs and back up. He squeezed her breasts in response and she pulled her hands out to yank at his trousers. “Off!” 

“Yes, ma’am. Here, love.” He paused to kiss her, hard. He shoved his trousers and pants off with one move and kicked them to the side and stood before her, naked, and her instincts warred between taking a long, long look and pressing every ragged nerve ending to the oasis of his skin. 

Skin hunger won out. She flung herself at him, torso to torso, arms around his neck, hands spread wide over his shoulder blades, and bent her knees just so, to get as much leg to leg contact as she could manage. His erection twitched against her belly and she groaned out loud. 

“I-I just can’t get too far away from you.”

“Won’t hear me complain.”

“But I want to look at you. You look-” she broke off with a cry as his fingers traced up her back. “You look so good.” 

“Promise I’ll let you ogle me all you want once we take the edge off.” He hooked a finger in her knickers, whipped them off, and scooped her off her feet on the way back up. He laid her out in the middle of the bed and climbed quickly over her. “I’ve got an idea. How’s this feel?” 

She moaned, loudly, at the weight of his body settling on her. “Yes, yes, yes. How did--ohhh!” He settled between her legs and she wrapped her legs around his. Chest to chest--and he linked his hands into hers and tugged them over her head--arm to arm--with a bit of roughness that revealed how he still struggled to be calm and take the lead. He pressed his face to the side of her neck, sucked at the juncture while she writhed under him at the arousal and relief now pinging through her whole body. 

“I think--” he broke off to whisper into her ear. “I think we’re nearly touching as much as...two people can be. Very nearly.” He shifted his hips and his cock brushed her but he didn’t push right inside as she’d expected. “Rassilon, I can feel how wet you are.” He nipped her earlobe. “So soft, every bit of you. Gonna take my time with you.” 

A thrill juddered along her spine. “But, I dunno if I can--” under different circumstances she would never object to taking time, but...

“Yeah, waited so long, might feel like we need to rush, but I have ideas. Can I try?” He returned to give her more slow, deep kisses, which she drank in before turning to gulp in air. He dropped his elbows to hold some weight off her. 

“Yes, I wanna try your ideas, so long as you don’t stop touchin’ me.” She craned her neck to kiss and lick at his neck and shoulder.

His voice at her ear got lower. “Never. Lie back, Rose. Want you to close your eyes. Good. Is this still ok? Can you breathe enough?”

Truthfully, she was breathless, but in a good way. This full body contact was the most delicious thing she could ever remember experiencing. She nodded against his face--his face, warmer than she would have expected, in fact, his whole body radiated heat. There would be sweat cooling whenever they parted-- 

“Here’s me drawin’ up charts and graphs about all the different things I want to do with you--”

She gasped at the way his voice went straight to her core. 

“--but tell me some things you want.” He paused and sucked on the skin behind her ear again and on her earlobe and she made another delighted sound. “Or I’ll tell you what I’m thinking and you tell me if you like it?”

“Yeah, that. Can’t hardly think right now. It all feels so good.”

“Good. So, hands. I’d really like to lay you down and touch you all over. Little hard to do now if we can’t be separated.”

She laughed lightly, “‘kay, yeah, I’d want that.” 

“Touch you from the inside? Always wondered what you’d feel like when you come.”

“Oh, God.” She felt her heart speed up. “You thought about that? On your own?” 

“Mm. More than once. Eventually I’ll get around to telling you everything I’ve imagined. All the places we’ve been where I’ve thought about being inside you.”

“You could be inside me now.” 

He pressed her hands harder into the mattress. “Soon. Soon you will have my hands and my cock and, mmm--” he punctuated with a bite, “my tongue--”

Rose tightened her thighs around him, but inside clenched around nothing; tension gathered inward from her entire body and seemed to vibrate with each word. She became aware of everything at once: the satisfying press of his skin, the sheets under her, the tickle of the hairs on his legs, her gasps filling her lungs, the stubble that scratched her ear when he spoke, the rumble of his voice, his cock so hard and yet so still where it pressed against her. Her hands craved it. 

“--because I want to taste you, would you like that?”

He fluttered his tongue across her pulse and she shattered. 

The Doctor swallowed her scream with his mouth. 

 

She shuddered with aftershocks and the Doctor rolled next to her, letting her catch her breath. 

“Ok, wow. Did you know that would happen?” 

“Educated guess.” His smile was infectious. “Look, I’m off you and you’re not panicking. Think that means we’ve got some...flexibility to continue.” His hand swooped across her thighs. “If you want?” 

His face became a touch vulnerable. Maybe he wanted to be sure her desire for him didn’t burn away with her orgasm. Far from it. The primal fear of him walking away had dissipated, leaving her with sensitized flesh that ached for him. She swirled her fingers on the back of his neck, pulled him toward her. “Mm-hmm, want you even more. Kiss me.” 

He was on her again and kissed her with a soft moan, but this time with his body held aloft, giving him more freedom of movement. He broke from her lips and moved to her neck and chest. Now that she could freely touch him, she swept her hands up and down his arms, over his shoulders, across his back, shivering at the coiled strength in every muscle she touched. He whispered something, she couldn’t catch the words, but it wasn’t English, while he kissed and licked across her belly before returning to her breasts. Her hands wrapped around his head and through his hair as he indulged, making small appreciative sounds around her nipple. 

She rolled her hips up, trying to make contact with him as her arousal spiked again. Realized she was pleading. He switched sides and she moaned loudly and pulled at his shoulders. “Doctor, ‘m ready. Please, please,” she panted, and tapped her heels on his bum for emphasis. 

He let his hips fall to assuage her, and she rocked against him, but he kept up the sweet torture of his tongue on her breasts. He smiled at her when he finally released them. “Definitely thought about that a lot.” But instead of crawling up her body, he went lower, sucking at her skin with long wet kisses all the way, until he dropped his head between her thighs. 

Rose breathed “oh” at the first touch of his tongue and rolled back, eyes squeezed shut, as he thrust inside her with his tongue, once, twice, with a moan she could feel. He moved upward and gently tested her response to each stroke, and finally licked across her sensitized clit when she was more than ready. She rewarded him with a loud sound and she felt him smile and repeat the move. 

With a sudden desperation to see-- _this is real--_ she leaned up on one elbow and was shocked by the erotic sight of the Doctor’s nude body spread across the bed and _that face_ , the face she loved more than anything in the universe, buried in her folds, eyes half-closed, and tongue slowly working her up. She groaned and he met her eyes. She couldn’t bear it for more than a second and dropped to the bed. 

He’d found the right rhythm so fast--she might have known--and she closed her eyes and let the sensations build. She’d let her feet come to rest on his sides, but her legs lifted as his arms snaked under them and reached up to grasp her breasts in both hands. She might have shouted “Doctor” or just thought it; she wasn’t sure anymore, but soon after he began to gently roll her nipples in time with his tongue she was screaming out loud and coming under his mouth, harder than the first time. 

  


No time to rest or think or plan this time. She was pleading. He was moving. Up…dragging his mouth along her skin and his hand was there, tender fingers alongside her clit, giving her more aftershocks, and he was pushing two fingers into her. She shouted something at him. He curled them up, stimulating her from the inside. His mouth was back on her chest, sucking, making marks on her breasts that she planned to cherish. His hand kept moving, she kept begging. He was murmuring. “Again. Again.” He sucked a nipple into his mouth, and twisted and rubbed with his beautiful, beautiful hand and she clenched hard, on his hand, and on the short hairs at the nape of his neck, and screamed as another orgasm shuddered through her. 

  


The fog cleared. She was lightheaded, maybe from hyperventilating, and she imagined electricity fizzing away in her extremities, but amazingly, she didn’t feel satisfied. Raw need still burned at the edges of her awareness. She clutched at his shoulders. “Doctor. Doctor, please.” 

He looked up from licking the valley between her breasts, eyes shockingly blue and wild. “Tell me what you want.” 

“More of you. Wanna touch you. I want you to fuck me. Please?”

She cried out when he pulled his hand out of her. He sat to his knees and she watched his forehead crease as he considered their bodies--she could almost feel him calculating. With a quick smile on the corner of his lips, he took her hand to lift her and flip their positions. He flopped back to the bed, and helped her straddle his thighs. Her mouth opened and she let her eyes roam his body, laid out in front of her. 

She dragged her fingertips around his chest and belly, leaned forward, and kissed his collarbone. He took her hands, interlocked his fingers with hers, and and drew her to him. His eyes never left hers until her cheek met his. He sighed and squeezed her hands, almost too tight. She kissed the corner of his mouth, and met him as he opened to her for the deepest of kisses. 

When she separated from him to lightly kiss the tip of his nose and smile at him, he grinned wickedly. “Rose Tyler, I want you to fuck _me._ ”

She whimpered. 

He lifted his head to rumble into her ear. “I’m yours. Use me.” 

His voice gave her a shiver. There was no way she’d refuse. She started with small nip on his earlobe and a kiss behind it--something about the way he’d concentrated efforts on hers earlier made her suspect it was a sensitive spot for him--and he trembled and fisted her hair. She repeated it a few times, a little harder, then went to treat the other side. He got louder and his cock twitched against her belly. 

Rose sat up, kissing his chest along the way, and hummed as she wrapped her hands around his cock, breathing, “S’beautiful.” Thick, heavy in her hands, velvety smooth. She stroked up and down, softly, gripped and dragged his skin with it. Wetness gathered at the tip. The Doctor groaned, eyes closed, and threw an arm over his furrowed brow. 

She considered taking him in her mouth. It looked so _good_ , and her mouth watered at the impulse. But the ache in her groin was too powerful and she decided to save it for later. No, now she would finally take what she’d craved all along--the Doctor, underneath her, inside her. She rose to her knees and waited. He opened his eyes, put his hands on her hips, and locked eyes with her as she sank down on him, so slowly, rocking her pelvis as he stretched her much more than his fingers had prepared her for. She inhaled deeply and cried out with the joy of it, tears welling. _Mine._

Being filled with him was almost too pleasurable to bear. She held her hips still, curled in on herself, her hands landed over both hearts, and she squeezed him inside her body in a tight rhythm. When she opened her eyes, he was staring at her chest, jaw clenching, coiled tension in his face. His hands twitched on her hips, and he looked at her eyes, but didn’t move. 

“My Doctor.” She had a mad notion that his syncopated heartsbeat was rising through her palms and straight into her own heart. “I love you.” His face quirked for a moment as if he might cry and his mouth opened and closed but he didn’t speak. “Been so good to me.” She relaxed her hands and smoothed them over his chest, watching carefully to see what pleasure he might take when her fingers grazed his nipples.

“I’ll never stop.” His hand caressed her belly. 

She began to rise and fall, experimenting with the sensations of him hitting her from different angles, and settled on leaning back to brace her hands on his thighs. She rolled her hips slowly. “Ohh--there,” she gasped, and repeated the motion that sent electricity up her spine. 

The Doctor’s mouth hung open. His hands moved softly across her body. He cupped her breasts. “I dream this. Makes me wake up so hard.”

She closed her eyes with the thrill that sent through her and smiled. Felt a bead a sweat trickle down her temple. “So you _do_ sleep? I wanna see that--oh!” She broke off when he thrust upwards. 

“You will. In all my dreams you’re over me shining like a golden goddess.” Hands glided over her again. “Now you’re real.”

“Mm-hmm.” The spark built again and she rolled faster. “Doctor--” She grabbed his hand and pressed it to where they were joined. “More please.” 

“Yes, love.” He met her rhythm and led her to move even faster, while his hand slid over her center, adding a touch of pressure which made Rose groan. “Again. Come around me. Let me feel you. Then I’m going to taste it.”

Her eyes stayed on him as she felt breaths escaping her, touched inside and out--his tight jaw, flushed face, and for a moment she watched his careful control fall away and saw the desperation in his eyes, his mouth moving over words she couldn’t register. 

The wave crested and pleasure zinged out to her nerve endings and back, and she lost her strength. His hands gripped under her thighs, controlling her, thrusting her through it, faster than before, until he roared and she felt herself lifted off him and flying forward. She flailed and grabbed the headboard, which was suddenly in front of her, as the Doctor placed her over his devouring tongue. 

No time to think--she continued to thrust against his mouth, over his tongue, until she was coming, again, over him, in wave after wave. 

His sounds--a mixture of groans and words she didn’t understand--became sharper, at once triumphant and frustrated. He pushed her back down his body and sat up, knees bent. She straddled him, settled into the cradle of his legs, and reached for his cock to slide him back inside her with a moan. _Finally close enough._ She clung to his back, and tightened her thighs around his hips. He guided her with fingers that dug into her flesh, drove up into her as she rode him. And before long, his strong arms held her so tightly she had visions of melting into him. She screamed through another rolling orgasm, or was this now all one that refused to end? _How was this even possible?_

And yet. And yet…the fire was not doused. She still needed him. And realized-- _he_ was the one she desired--she would only be satisfied when he was.

“Doctor,” she panted into his ear. “Doctor, please come. Come inside me.”

He turned and caught her in a sloppy kiss, before bracing his forehead on hers to steady their rhythm. “I need--I need you so badly. I--” he broke off, choked. 

“You have me. Let go. I feel--oh--you’re making me come again. Please come with me.”

Faces together. Panting breath mingling. She hung on the precipice again and her senses seemed to collapse into each other. She saw behind her eyes…dark gold, sparks, a pattern deeper and richer inside her than anything else yet, an unpronounceable sound in her head. On the outside, the Doctor’s shouts grew louder. She heard “mine” “my Rose” and more in his own language. His cock swelled harder inside her and she clawed at his back, reaching, reaching, _don’t move, right there_. 

Then he was gasping, and she was digging into his skin, and he pulsed inside her and shuddered under her hard enough to make her hold on for dear life, and she blazed into a deep climax that shot to her fingers and toes in harmonic chords and ricocheted back. His hands had moved to her shoulders and still tugged her body down to meet him, slow and shallow, not giving her up just yet. She laid her head on his shoulder, put her lips on his neck, melted into him. 

When she found herself again, he’d fallen back on the bed. She quivered, head on his chest, his arms encircled her and his hands slowly grazed her back. She kept her eyes closed, though the soft light had dimmed. His double-heartbeat thrummed under her ear, lulled her. _Should probably move_ , she thought. Separate from him, clean up, see where they go from here. But his hands and his hearts and his warmth and his skin cocooned her. _Just another minute_... 

“Is it over?” she whispered. 

He hummed and brushed her hair back. She hadn’t thought to ask how she would know, but as soon as she said it, she realized she was different now. The magnet sensation that had tormented her for hours was gone and she was utterly satiated, left alone with nothing but her love for this man. 

_TBC_


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who has reblogged and/or commented, or otherwise let us know you were reading! The lovely feedback has been positively overwhelming, and we are so very grateful. It’s been a wild ride, and we have had a lot of fun. Please enjoy the final chapter, and thank you so much for going on this journey with us!

The Doctor twisted strands of tangled blonde hair around his fingertips and felt the moment when Rose’s body fully collapsed in sleep. For some number of minutes (he purposely stopped counting) he reveled in the rise and fall of her chest and each precious heartbeat. His eyes closed and he tuned in to the soft thrum of her pulse points where she pressed onto him, tension releasing from her muscles as she succumbed to deeper sleep. Sweat cooled on her back. He wondered if she might start to get uncomfortable, especially when his own temperature fell back to normal. 

A bit regretfully, he rolled her over and disentangled to go clean himself up, bring a flannel, and make her more settled for sleeping. She hummed a bit, but didn’t wake. Job done to his satisfaction, he returned to her side and pulled her into a spoon.

Generally, he thought little of sleeping. Needs must, but he’d usually felt it to be a waste of time, and later in his life, too risky for nightmares. 

_Tonight, though_. 

He folded his knees behind hers, dropped a calf over her feet when he detected their surface temperature dropping, and pulled a sheet over them, calculating that it would be enough to diffuse their combined body heat to her ideal comfort level. He tucked an arm around her waist and inhaled the scent of her hair, fully sinking into this comfortable embrace.

Of all the surprises in this unexpected extra life, this was the one that should have shocked him the most. That he would be intimately wrapped around a human woman, skin to skin, naked, without so much as a twitch telling him to get up and do anything else. Not to mention, looking forward to sleep with a sense of safety he hadn’t even known was possible before. 

Rose continued to sleep like the dead. While he knew it was mostly an aftereffect of the drug dissipating from her system, he couldn’t help indulging in some manly pride while he relived some of the peak moments of the last hours. He’d given her everything in him, made it as good and satisfying for her as he possibly could, and _she loved him_. The way he’d never thought possible. Honestly he could die happy at this moment.

He chuckled at the thought and gave her a squeeze, imagining her inevitable protest if he’d said that out loud. “No worries, love,” he murmured aloud, “not goin’ anywhere. Not yet. Thinkin’ of how I’ve just scratched the surface with what I want to do with you.” 

All of this was miraculous. Floating in this haze of sated relaxation, he allowed his time senses to the fore, something he rarely did when it came to himself, much less Rose. 

_Dangerous, that._

This time he reached far enough to see a golden thread weaving back into his. They were always heading for something. Timelines could feel like predestination though that’s not at all how it works. He guessed that he could pull a thread back and find different ways their story could have gone, and he considered a moment...but let that curiosity float away. Drowsiness drifted over him and he felt himself skating over that golden thread as it grew stronger and brighter, his mind stretching toward an event horizon in his distant vision, until a golden explosion hurtled over his head--his synapses buzzed and he startled awake with a gasp. 

Rose mumbled and wiggled against him and he realized he’d yanked her too tightly against him. He shook his head, waving away the remnants of the dream, the echo of a sound he couldn’t remember but felt sure was Rose’s voice. He took a deep breath and concentrated on calming his racing hearts. 

Not a nightmare, but not the dreamless calm he’d wanted either. He scolded himself for playing around with timelines on less than full alert, cleared his mind, and melted back against Rose, making a mantra of the rhythm of her breaths and her scent that surrounded him. His last thought before falling into a deep sleep was to wonder with a smile if Jack had figured out what happened. 

  


When he woke, it was 4 hours and 51 minutes later. The TARDIS had turned the lights completely off except for a distant view of a starry sky above his head. It was the most continuous sleep he could remember having in this regeneration. 

Meanwhile, Rose had sprawled onto her front, though their legs were still entwined. He had the foolish notion that his chest missed her, which made him laugh quietly and Rose stirred. 

She stiffened and pushed up, wide-eyed. “You’re still here.”

“Wasn’t gonna leave you.” His heart gave a funny clench. “Is that all right?” Did he have this all wrong? He flashed to the last words she said before passing out: _Is it over?_ “Did you want me to give you some space?” He started to lean away.

“No no, stay here.” She rolled onto her back and stayed quiet for a bit. “I can’t think of what to say. That was so intense. Didn’t expect anything like it.” 

“Nothing I expected either.” He reached for her hand and she met him halfway, entangling their fingers. “Not how I would have chosen to get you into bed,” he paused for a closed-mouth smile, “but I can’t say I’m sorry it happened. What about you?”

She rubbed his stubble. “No, ‘m not sorry at all. I needed you and you helped me.”

“Helped meself too, gotta be honest about that.”

“I wanted you to help yourself.” And there it was, her wicked, tongue-touched grin. “Kinda thinking about when you might help yourself more?”

He returned her joyful smile and kissed her shoulder. “Crossed my mind too. There’s a relief! Was afraid you'd look at me and only be reminded of feeling helpless and--and your will being taken away.” 

“I do remember that feeling. But I don't want to think about...certain other people...ever again. Only you, and how you made me feel safe and how you said--unless...”

“Hmm?”

“‘Less you were just trying to convince me, so I'd get it out of my system.” She didn't meet his eyes. “Everything you said--is it all the truth?”

He leaned over her. “Rose Tyler.” Pressed a soft kiss to her lips. “Every word.” And he kissed more around her face until he felt a tear fall under his lips. “Hey now, none of that.” 

She laughed as another tear dropped. “‘M just happy.” She pushed him to his back and tucked herself under his arm, resting her head on his shoulder. Her hand moved from atop one heart to the other and she gazed at the night sky above them. “The TARDIS must be happy. My ceiling stars are back. Did you ask for that?” 

“Not in so many words. Guess she felt it was a good night to open a window.” 

“Pretty constellations. What’s she showing us on the planetarium tonight?”

He craned his neck to look at her. “We’re still on-planet. And that--” he pointed into the air, “is the star system surrounding us. Haven’t I told you? When I say she opens a window that’s exactly what I mean. A microscopic portal in the outside wall that’s--” 

“Bigger on the inside!” Rose interrupted. “Oh, my God, I can’t believe I never thought of that before. Explains why it’s daylight sometimes but not in the vortex--show’s how much I’ve paid attention. Things’re always changing and moving around in here. Though I can always find what I’m looking for…” She paused. “’cept you, sometimes.” 

He gave her a gentle squeeze. “Eh, sometimes a Time Lord needs a little peace and quiet.” 

“Mm-hmm. More like somewhere to brood over your regrets about picking up noisy apes to play with.” The hand drawing circles over his hearts started to send pleasant tightness down his belly. 

“There’s one human I never regret.” He put a finger under her chin and lifted her for a kiss. A soft memory swirled up, beautiful words he used to know, and before he thought it through he was saying them. “ _Through nights like this one I held her in my arms. I kissed her again and again under the endless sky_.”

Rose pulled back and blinked. “What’s that?” 

“I knew a poet, before the war. Well, I meant before my war, though yours too. He recited it all for me once.”

“S’beautiful. Is there more?” 

_Tonight I can write the saddest lines._

The gold thread shimmered in his time sense again, crossing his visual cortex--he saw himself, shaggy and gray, writing the words on a chalkboard in a shiny, empty room.

_The night is starry and she is not with me._

“Nevermind that one. Too sad.”

“Sad poems are more beautiful.” She dropped her head back to his shoulder and he traced her shoulder blade and looked back to the stars. 

“Mm, you think?”

“Yep!” 

He felt her cheek swell into a smile on his skin and gave it a moment before he spoke again. “ _I love you simply, without problems or pride_...”

She held her breath as he continued, _“I love you in this way because I don’t know any other way of loving but this--_ ”

She breathed a soft “oh.” 

“ _in which there is no I or you; so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand_.” He threaded his fingers through hers. “ _so intimate that when I fall asleep it is your eyes that close_.”

A tear dropped onto his skin. His own eyes welled and he batted away the whisper of timelines trying to fight their way into his conscious mind. It was all probabilities anyway, and the greatest probability was still that a single Time Lord eventually wouldn’t survive out in the universe. A chance to live out the remaining days of his species being happy and making someone else happy? His reasons for not taking it had dried up. 

Rose pressed kisses up his neck and sat up with a teary smile. “If someone told me a year ago I’d be _naked_ in bed with you. And you tellin’ me poems!”

“What, you thought I didn’t have a romantic soul underneath it all?” 

“I guess you’d have to, to travel like you do.” 

“True. Though, I used to be more romantic. If you’d met me then, you’d have _really_ loved me. Younger, prettier, a lot more hair…” He made a twirling motion in his pretend locks.

Rose giggled and shook her head. “You’re gorgeous.” She rested her arms on her knees and looked at the sky again. “Sometimes I try to imagine what living for a thousand years is like. How could I ever know you well enough? You don’t talk about a lot of that stuff.”

“There’s a lot that...doesn’t matter anymore. But some that does, that I _should_ tell you, should’ve already. We’re properly together now, right?” They grinned at each other. “You can ask me anything and if I can tell you, I will.” 

Her face turned vulnerable. “Okay. Thank you for sayin’ that.” He was close to getting shaken by her direct look when she changed course playfully. “I can’t imagine you with more hair, but if you want to grow it out again sometime, give it a try. I’ll see how I like pulling it instead of swooshing.” She demonstrated with a swoosh that started playful, but turned more sensual. His nerves tingled as her hand slowed and the short strands popped out slowly from under her fingers. 

He shivered audibly and captured her wrist. Her eyes widened as he brought it to his lips and took a quick taste. His cock stiffened. 

She looked down pointedly. “So I guess you _like_ having your hair played with?” 

“Mm-hmm. How rested do you feel?” He calculated angles of rotation to have her under him in the shortest possible time. 

“I really wish I didn’t need the loo so badly right now! But I do!” she groaned, over his sigh. “What I really need--ha, thank you!” she called, scooting over to the nightstand, and the Doctor saw the TARDIS had provided a giant glass of water, which Rose gulped. 

She stepped off the bed with a grunt and moved gingerly toward the loo. When the light fell across her torso, he saw it: bruises around her hips that looked, to his great discomfort, like the general shape of his fingers. 

He jumped up. “Oh, no, no, no--Rose, I hurt you!” 

“Stop it, Doctor, ‘m fine, just a little sore. Feels good, in a way.”

He stared at her, not sure how to take that, but she kept smiling. 

“Ya know, you hear about shags so good you can’t walk the next day--never believed it until now.” Her tongue touched her teeth and he wanted to cry but also kiss her. “Jus’ give me a few minutes and stop worrying!” She pecked his cheek. “‘Kay?” 

He nodded, but didn’t feel too much better the whole time she was gone. Maybe he should take her to the medbay--he swore upon remembering he’d intended to evaluate her other wrist. He was supposed to be the one managing this situation, and he’d let himself get out of control, use too much strength--

Humans are fragile. He _really_ should have been more careful. 

By the time Rose came out he had more lights on. Now he could see bruises on her back and thighs, and bite and suction marks around her neck and shoulders. More finger marks on her shoulders and he was hit with a memory of his fingertips digging in, pulling her down on him, her cries… 

Rose pursed her lips at him as she walked past and rolled back onto the bed. “I don’t like the frown on your face.” 

“Wondering what kind of raving beast I turned into. Did you see yourself?” 

“Yeah. And ya know ‘raving beast’ sounds a little sexy. ‘Sides--” she circled a finger in the air, “Haven’t you noticed I left some marks on you too? ’M not exactly upset about it.” 

“I heal faster.” He hadn’t noticed, actually, and found his protest dying out. He touched a tender spot on his own collarbone and was rewarded with another rush of exhilarating memories involving her teeth. “Point taken.” 

“It was an unusual situation. Now stop it!”

“Ah.” He nodded with a closed-mouth smile. He calmed his heartsbeat and waited for the rest of his body’s anxiety responses to abate. 

“Anyway, since I did a lotta crying and sweating and...everything,” she said with a wink, “was thinkin’ about showering off, but my legs are a little shaky. Maybe I’ll have a bath before we go back to bed? I mean, _I_ will, but, ya know, if you wanna come with me?”

“‘Course I will. Not ready to leave you yet. Wait, I have the perfect thing! Or I should, if she’ll send it to me!” He raised his voice at the TARDIS as he ran to the storage shelves in the loo and rummaged until he found the bottle he expected. “Wait there!” he called, and set about preparing a bath. 

He returned and scooped Rose off the bed as she squealed (“you’re being ridiculous”) and deposited her gently into the fizzing tub. 

“Mmmm, feels amazin’!”

“I’ve added healing oil salts from the Ethorutas colonies--they’re most famous for luxury spa tourism. Acts as a soap too, in a way.”

“Mmm, I feel better already.” She floated for a minute, then sank completely underwater and swished her hair around. He knelt on the rug and watched her until bubbles rose and she sat up with a satisfied inhale. She rubbed water off her face and side-eyed him. “What?” 

“Waiting to see if the bruises fade.” 

She touched his chin. “Hush. I kinda want them to stay. Makes it feel...real.” 

“Oh, and this--.” He caught her hand and raised it up to examine where the cuffs had dug into the delicate bones. 

“It'll be fine.”

He walked his fingers meticulously around the injury, opened and closed her hand, and rolled her wrist a few times.

“Satisfied?” 

He huffed. “Somehow you didn't sprain it. Well, let it soak.”

“Yes, _Doctor_.” She winked and complied, leaned against the back of the tub, and sighed contentedly at the ceiling. “Will you hand me my fancy stuff, wanna wash my hair.” She indicated a bottle she’d bought on a recent shopping excursion to a future mall. 

He retrieved it, with a flash of inspiration. “Why don’t you relax and let me take care of you? Here.” He leaned over the end of her clawfoot tub and gathered her hair. He swept a palmful of cucumber-smelling shampoo through and began to massage her scalp. He was rewarded with her deep groan. 

“That is _brilliant_. You’ve done it now, I’m never washing my own hair again.” 

He grunted. “Don’t get too excited. This is only gonna happen on special occasions.” But his hearts flipped.

“Whatever you say.” 

She sounded a bit smug, so he retaliated by upping the pressure in his fingertips and moving in a spreading and retreating pattern until she was reduced to incoherent sounds. Gooseflesh sprung up on her arms, to his delight, and her nipples stiffened. His thumbs stroked down the back of her neck and she shuddered, so he brought his other fingers down to join in the spinal nerve stimulation, taking note of every spot that got a reaction. 

He was so intent on this work that he was a bit startled when she grabbed his wrists and pulled his slippery hands to her chest with a breathless “please?” 

“Yes, fantastic,” he murmured, when his fingers slid across her gloriously tight nipples. He decided on ‘soft’ as the plan and set up a pattern of feather light grazes circling around and over them. And his Rose--so responsive it made him feel he could fly--she wiggled and moaned and pressed her thighs together, and for a wild moment he wondered if she would come with no further touch. But her legs opened and she looked up at him, beautiful mouth open and silently pleading. And in that moment he would have given her the entire universe. 

So he gave her his hand. Opening her folds, sliding slowly--and as softly as he’d touched her breasts--small circles, watching her face, adjusting to the smallest twitch of a response, until her eyes rolled back and her gasps became cries and water splashed out onto his knees when she bucked against his palm. 

This unexpected life. He definitely didn’t deserve the joy of watching her face in a moment like this, but he’d take it. 

  


Not much later, rinsed and dried and back in bed, Rose stretched languidly on her back and reached for the Doctor where he lay watching her. 

“Come ‘ere. Wanna feel you.” 

He scooted next to her on his side, and leaned up on his elbow. His free hand skimmed carefully across her body, testing the now-faded spots. 

“‘M not made of glass, Doctor.” She took his hand to her lips and kissed the palm and the pad of his thumb, traced the knuckles and bones on the back of his hand with her fingertips. His eyes closed and he concentrated on the softness of her fingers, pressing into the veins that double-pumped in the back of his hand before sliding up his arm and around to his shoulder and neck. She turned to him--face to face, body to body--and her breath ghosted before she covered his lips with hers. Her hand continued up the side of his face and behind his ear. 

He wrapped his arms around her, tugged her closer, but she grabbed back at him and they fumbled and pulled on each other--couldn't get close enough--until she'd settled his hips inside her legs and lifted her knees up higher around him and hugged him with her legs--and there was only one way to be closer. 

She smiled into his mouth and murmured, “That's better.” He nipped at her lip teasingly and curled down to nuzzle into the softness of her chest and up to her neck and with kisses he moved up from underneath her chin. Her hands cupped his face and he did the same as their lips met again. 

Eye to eye, breath to breath--he thrust his hips up to roll his hardening cock against her. “Rose. Need you.” 

She hummed an assent against his lips as her eyes fluttered shut. He ghosted a hand down the side of her body, inhaling her gasp when he worked a hand between them to line himself up and press into her. She threaded her hands into his hair, nails scratching in time to his motions. He pushed rhythmically at her entrance, waiting for her wetness to surround him fully before going further, reveling in the grinding pleasure and her sounds. His hand never stopped moving--he wanted to touch all of her, caressing from her hair to her back to her thighs and knees and ankles and back up again. He dipped his head again to kiss over her breasts and tease her nipples with the tip of his tongue. 

He felt more than heard a pleading “Doctor” from inside her chest, and she used her legs to yank him up and fully seat him inside her with a groan of satisfaction. He popped away from a breast to grin at her. 

“Impatient.” 

“Mmm.” 

“Like this, do you?” 

“S’perfect. I wanted to do it with, um, just _us_ , you know? But I wasn’t sure if I could--ah!” She broke off at his deep thrust. “I thought we’d go again, for you.” She closed her eyes and rocked against him. “But I keep wanting more. How’s it possible, without the drug?”

“Guess we haven’t found your limits yet. Give me time.” He pressed his forehead to hers, nearly overcome with elation and fighting to keep control, with Rose squeezing him from the inside and the way her mouth opened at the top of every thrust, driving steadily up into her. 

Her laughing “oh my God” was muffled by his return to her mouth. He sucked on her tongue, one hand roving over her breasts and the other pulling her harder onto him. He swore he could feel her orgasm building in her spine before it happened, the slow, deep, rolling intimacy of this position almost too much for his hearts to bear. 

Her mind was a vibrating beacon. Without the drug in their way, it was harder to ignore the desire to dive _all_ the way in. But when she cried out and fluttered around him, he focused on riding out her climax with her. 

“Closer.” It was so soft a plea that fear struck him that it was her _thought_ and he’d pulled it out of her involuntarily. But, no, she’d whispered it as she clawed at his back, quivering. 

_Not yet_ , he chastised himself, at the greedy longing to attempt a connection she may not want for all he knew. He pushed aside the mental urge, rolled on top of her, and grabbed the headboard with a loud grunt. 

He was chasing his own fulfillment now, pleasure concentrating and building as he fucked her harder and he tried not to see the gold threads of time appearing in the back of his mind. He heard “more” and gave it to her. A glance down--her eyes were wide. He stared, caught up, her irises grew more golden. He heard his own voice, shouting her name like a mantra as his climax rocketed through him, filling, filling, filling her. 

He dropped to her chest, face in her neck. Found it wet with his tears. She rubbed her hands up and down his back, wrapped herself around him, and held him. So tightly. He closed his eyes, overwhelmed.

  


“ _My Doctor_.” It was an exhale, but he heard it like a shout from a canyon. 

He’d been sleeping next to Rose, face tucked into her neck. And once again, he’d been taunted by the cataclysm of the approaching fixed point. But there was something else. A change. _Chalk words dissolving into dust._ He wasn’t sure if he should try for more clarity. 

“Had a dream.” Rose spoke before he’d realized she was awake. “I saved you. And we went so many more places, always together, standing on a hundred worlds, and you always look at me in that way you have.” She got quiet and the Doctor held his breath as the moment filled with portent. “Was so clear. Didn’t even feel like a dream, an’ it’s not fading.”

She turned and pressed her lips to his before leaning back to see his eyes. “Maybe I’m getting psychic like you.” 

“Maybe you are. We can give telepathy a test run.” He watched her face, but she didn’t even blink. Could she feel the sudden jolt of hope in his hearts? He hadn't intended to test those waters yet, but here she was, somehow matching him once again.

“I feel sure it means we’ll always be together.”

“Ordinarily, I wouldn’t risk saying this, but I think you’re right. Something’s different. A change in time--because we’re together now.”

She smiled so widely it made his hearts ache. “We’re together.” 

“Yes, we are. Still gonna be trouble, us. Big trouble sometimes.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Might keep you here in this bed, ‘stead of risking you to an unfeeling universe.” He ran a tickling hand around her torso and she giggled. He crushed her to him and breathed her in. “Stay with me?” 

“Forever.”

He closed his eyes. Golden thread meets blue, twisting beyond the cataclysm. She is more than he ever deserved. 

********************************************************

Epilogue

Jack walked to the galley sometime during day two of their stop on this planet. He hadn’t heard a peep from his companions since the events of the night before, though he was pretty sure if something was terribly wrong the ship would have found a way to prod him.

He’d stayed close, just in case, and puttered around the console finishing the repair the Doctor had been working on. When that was done, he'd scrounged around for something else within his skill set, but finally just oiled everything that looked grimy. He couldn't understand the TARDIS the way the Doctor or even Rose did, but attributed the general sense of well-being he felt to her being satisfied with his work.

He finally went to sleep in the library trying to read a novel. And this morning he’d ventured down the hall toward his own room, and stopped, dumbfounded, at what he saw on the floor along the way. 

He'd stared at Rose’s door, but still heard nothing but complete silence, so he’d showered and changed before running out to a street vendor to get something to eat.

He pushed open the galley door and stopped, agape. 

The Doctor stood at the stove, spatula in hand, apparently frying up a full English. Jack didn’t know what to focus on first. His bare feet were something Jack had never laid eyes on before, and he wore a pair of cotton pajama pants in a dark navy. But most astonishing was his bare back...complete with red scratches, and, he noted with some amusement, fingernail marks that continued all the way up to his ears. 

He whistled. 

The Doctor looked over his shoulder, brow raised, but said nothing. 

“So…everything go ok?” 

“You hungry, Jack? I’ll have to add some.”

Jack held up a bag. “Leftovers.” 

“Close your mouth. You act like you’ve never seen a torso before.” But Jack didn't miss the corners of his lips lifting as he turned back to the stove. _Cheeky, Doctor_.

“That was a lot of hours of hearing absolutely nothing. I was a little worried.”

“All under control,” the Doctor replied in a casual tone. “And I guess the TARDIS decided a little soundproofing was in order.” 

Jack couldn’t help thinking about that for an extra moment and if his heart skipped a little, who could blame him. 

The Doctor looked back at him again. “Any idea where my jacket and boots ran off to?”

Jack laughed, “Yeah, the jump seat. Felt wrong to leave your coat in a heap. Want me to go get them?”

“Nah, s’fine, I'll pick ‘em up later.” He flipped bacon and eggs and dropped tomatoes onto the skillet, before setting out two plates with a graceful flourish. “Got anywhere you want to visit for a bit? Rose and I are going to take a little vacation.”

“Uh, what about staying here? Met someone the other night I wouldn’t mind going back to see.” _Vacation_ , eh?

“That’ll work. Take your time. Rose might want to go to the beach or spa. But we’ll probably spend a fair bit of time resting.” 

“‘Uh _huh_. So, why don't I just pop in and check on Rose?” He obviously wasn't going to get the whole story from the Doctor, and this was a story he needed to hear.

“If you like. You may have to wake her up.” He gathered more supplies and prepared the teapot. Jack smiled as he watched. He’d privately held the opinion that the Doctor really needed to get laid, but seeing his happy, relaxed manner now…the change in him was more palpable than he could have imagined.

“Really, Doc, how is she?” The Doctor stopped moving and met his eyes. Jack was struck by the softness there. 

The Doctor finally broke into a huge grin. “She’s fantastic.” 

  


_FIN_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Tonight I Can Write the Saddest Lines](https://www.poemhunter.com/poem/tonight-i-can-write-the-saddest-lines/)   
>  [Sonnet XVII](https://www.poemhunter.com/poem/xvii-i-do-not-love-you/)   
>  [The position that the Doctor and Rose end up in after the bath. (Link NSFW)](https://www.360nobs.com/2015/11/sex-position-week-path-heaven/)

**Author's Note:**

> * fleurdeneuf: Way back when @dwsmutfest was doing a bunch of kink prompts, I got to thinking about the sex pollen prompt and how the story would go if Rose were the one affected, because it’s usually the Doctor in that scenario. I rambled about it to csv and to my shock, she said, “Let’s do it!” Me: “…What?” Csv: “Let’s do it! It’ll be fun and it’s got a natural two chapter break!” And now here we are, five chapters later. The idea was mine, but the words are hers, so anything good is due to her (and anything bad is due to me, naturally). It’s been a ton of fun, and I am eternally grateful to her for putting up with my flailings and writing me so, so much smut.  
> *chiaroscuroverse: Lol, “two chapters”! I really thought that. Yes, this thing kept growing more feelings, but the process was so exciting, getting to talk through and plan everything together. This fic is Fleur’s baby and I’m so glad we got to do it together. And I’m eternally grateful for her infinite patience with my muse running off for long stretches and for believing in me that this would happen!


End file.
